Dear Jeff and Debra, Our 29-year- old daughter is just completing inpatient treatment for alcoholism. We think she’s done well in treatment, but she doesn’t seem interested in her aftercare plan. What can we do to encourage her? –Anxious Parents
https://lovefirst.net/wp-content/uploads/2018/01/pexels-photo-273222__.jpg38405760Jeff Jay & Debra Jayhttps://lovefirst.net/wp-content/uploads/2021/03/LF-master-sm-340x75-2.jpgJeff Jay & Debra Jay2018-01-14 21:30:522022-01-11 09:43:57What’s The Plan
Want to have some great non-alcoholic beverages to offer your friends and family this holiday season? We’ve got you covered. For many years, AAA has published “The Great Pretenders” holiday drink guide, with creative and delicious recipes.
https://lovefirst.net/wp-content/uploads/2018/03/pexels-photo-452737.jpeg12801920Jeff Jay & Debra Jayhttps://lovefirst.net/wp-content/uploads/2021/03/LF-master-sm-340x75-2.jpgJeff Jay & Debra Jay2017-12-14 23:18:442021-12-20 21:31:02The Great Pretenders
Dear Jeff and Debra, I’m feeling overwhelmed. I finally got my wife into a residential treatment program for her alcoholism, but I’m being asked to go to Al-Anon and begin something called Structured Family Recovery. In addition, I’m supposed to work a program of some kind myself, and stop enabling. It seems like too much. […]
https://lovefirst.net/wp-content/uploads/2018/03/pexels-photo-64775.jpeg11681920Jeff Jay & Debra Jayhttps://lovefirst.net/wp-content/uploads/2021/03/LF-master-sm-340x75-2.jpgJeff Jay & Debra Jay2017-11-14 23:29:092022-01-11 09:44:59Trust The Process
Dear Jeff and Debra, My daughter is an alcoholic, and she refuses to get help. People tell me there’s nothing I can do until she hits bottom, but she has two small children, and I just can’t bear to watch this go on much longer. Is hitting bottom the only way? – Worried Mother
https://lovefirst.net/wp-content/uploads/2018/03/iStock-644994680-1.jpg25763865Jeff Jay & Debra Jayhttps://lovefirst.net/wp-content/uploads/2021/03/LF-master-sm-340x75-2.jpgJeff Jay & Debra Jay2017-06-23 01:02:252022-01-11 09:45:29The Myth of Hitting Bottom
“Make me a channel of your peace….” —Prayer of St. Francis We can all admire the prayer attributed to St. Francis, no matter what our pastoral, teaching, or care-giving role. But what can I do to keep my own channel clear? Having worked as an addiction counselor for decades, I know something about crisis management […]
A letter from one of our readers… Dear Jeff and Debra, My little brother is successful in business, but his life is being ruined by alcohol. He’s already lost his marriage because of his drinking and verbal abuse, but he’s still playing a blame game.
Dear Jeff and Debra, Our adult daughter’s life has been shattered by addiction, causing hurt and harm to everyone around her. She’s been through residential treatment twice, and is now living in a sober house, far from home. She asking us to trust her and allow her to come back to live with us, but […]
https://lovefirst.net/wp-content/uploads/2018/02/iStock-690816474.jpg25763865Debra E. Jayhttps://lovefirst.net/wp-content/uploads/2021/03/LF-master-sm-340x75-2.jpgDebra E. Jay2016-11-18 01:15:212021-12-20 21:37:05Rebuilding Trust
Joseph Campbell was an influential thinker, weaving together the stories of many cultures into a seamless narrative. His most famous book, The Hero with a Thousand Faces, demonstrated that the travails of our individual lives and the teachings of the world’s great religions have a lot in common—namely struggle, divine help (usually disguised), and deliverance.
Here is a PDF of an article I wrote for Human Development magazine. The article begins on page 8. Addiction and Redemption, by Jeff Jay The article contains some material from my book, Navigating Grace. It also contains material on Steps 1–5. I hope you’ll pass it on. –Jeff
https://lovefirst.net/wp-content/uploads/2018/02/iStock-621980842.jpg25763865Jeff Jayhttps://lovefirst.net/wp-content/uploads/2021/03/LF-master-sm-340x75-2.jpgJeff Jay2016-09-16 01:25:102022-01-11 09:47:49Addiction and Redemption: The Way Out
Dear Jeff and Debra, My wife has an alcohol problem, and she knows it. She’s admitted she’s an alcoholic. After trying to quit on her own, she tried going to a few AA meetings, but nothing seems to work. I don’t know how to help her. She’s tried everything. What do you suggest?
https://lovefirst.net/wp-content/uploads/2021/03/LF-master-sm-340x75-2.jpg00Jeff Jay & Debra Jayhttps://lovefirst.net/wp-content/uploads/2021/03/LF-master-sm-340x75-2.jpgJeff Jay & Debra Jay2016-08-02 15:51:092022-01-11 09:48:31Why isn’t AA helping?
The legendary Jerry McDonald of Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation, interviewed Debra Jay about her book, “It Takes a Family.” Debra was presenting on the topic of Structured Family Recovery™ and the best methods to increase family involvement and improve treatment outcomes.
https://lovefirst.net/wp-content/uploads/2018/02/iStock-522861144-e1646436162708.jpg8471280Jeff Jayhttps://lovefirst.net/wp-content/uploads/2021/03/LF-master-sm-340x75-2.jpgJeff Jay2016-08-01 01:31:392018-07-19 16:16:57Debra Jay interviewed at the Women’s Symposium
Dear Jeff and Debra, My husband went to treatment, but he started drinking again after he got home. He was only there nine days, but it didn’t seem to help at all. What can we do? I’m so frustrated!
I’m doing a new series of articles for Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation called “Inside the Twelve Steps.” The first article is now available online (free, of course). Inside Step One: http://www.hazeldenbettyford.org/articles/jay/inside-step-one Hope you enjoy it!
Addicted in Academe
What’s The Plan
Dear Jeff and Debra, Our 29-year- old daughter is just completing inpatient treatment for alcoholism. We think she’s done well in treatment, but she doesn’t seem interested in her aftercare plan. What can we do to encourage her? –Anxious Parents
The Great Pretenders
Want to have some great non-alcoholic beverages to offer your friends and family this holiday season? We’ve got you covered. For many years, AAA has published “The Great Pretenders” holiday drink guide, with creative and delicious recipes.
Trust The Process
Dear Jeff and Debra, I’m feeling overwhelmed. I finally got my wife into a residential treatment program for her alcoholism, but I’m being asked to go to Al-Anon and begin something called Structured Family Recovery. In addition, I’m supposed to work a program of some kind myself, and stop enabling. It seems like too much. […]
The Myth of Hitting Bottom
Dear Jeff and Debra, My daughter is an alcoholic, and she refuses to get help. People tell me there’s nothing I can do until she hits bottom, but she has two small children, and I just can’t bear to watch this go on much longer. Is hitting bottom the only way? – Worried Mother
Clearing the Channel
“Make me a channel of your peace….” —Prayer of St. Francis We can all admire the prayer attributed to St. Francis, no matter what our pastoral, teaching, or care-giving role. But what can I do to keep my own channel clear? Having worked as an addiction counselor for decades, I know something about crisis management […]
The Silent Treatment
A letter from one of our readers… Dear Jeff and Debra, My little brother is successful in business, but his life is being ruined by alcohol. He’s already lost his marriage because of his drinking and verbal abuse, but he’s still playing a blame game.
Rebuilding Trust
Dear Jeff and Debra, Our adult daughter’s life has been shattered by addiction, causing hurt and harm to everyone around her. She’s been through residential treatment twice, and is now living in a sober house, far from home. She asking us to trust her and allow her to come back to live with us, but […]
The Hero’s Journey
Joseph Campbell was an influential thinker, weaving together the stories of many cultures into a seamless narrative. His most famous book, The Hero with a Thousand Faces, demonstrated that the travails of our individual lives and the teachings of the world’s great religions have a lot in common—namely struggle, divine help (usually disguised), and deliverance.
Addiction and Redemption: The Way Out
Here is a PDF of an article I wrote for Human Development magazine. The article begins on page 8. Addiction and Redemption, by Jeff Jay The article contains some material from my book, Navigating Grace. It also contains material on Steps 1–5. I hope you’ll pass it on. –Jeff
Why isn’t AA helping?
Dear Jeff and Debra, My wife has an alcohol problem, and she knows it. She’s admitted she’s an alcoholic. After trying to quit on her own, she tried going to a few AA meetings, but nothing seems to work. I don’t know how to help her. She’s tried everything. What do you suggest?
Debra Jay interviewed at the Women’s Symposium
The legendary Jerry McDonald of Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation, interviewed Debra Jay about her book, “It Takes a Family.” Debra was presenting on the topic of Structured Family Recovery™ and the best methods to increase family involvement and improve treatment outcomes.
Treatment Didn’t Work?
Dear Jeff and Debra, My husband went to treatment, but he started drinking again after he got home. He was only there nine days, but it didn’t seem to help at all. What can we do? I’m so frustrated!
Inside Step One
I’m doing a new series of articles for Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation called “Inside the Twelve Steps.” The first article is now available online (free, of course). Inside Step One: http://www.hazeldenbettyford.org/articles/jay/inside-step-one Hope you enjoy it!
The Unexpected Gift
Imagine a young woman, about sixteen years old, living in a conservative religious community, and discovering she’s pregnant.