Love First Intervention

create a pathway to yes

How can we get our love one to accept help? to get detoxed? to enter treatment? stay in recovery?

A damaging myth:

Some people say: “You can’t help them until they want help.”

Many families are told they must wait for their alcoholic or addict to hit bottom before there is any hope for recovery. But these myths put families through years of pain. No one ever mentions that when the alcoholic hits bottom, they take their family along for the ride — even the smallest children.

A Love First intervention provides a different solution.

A new perspective:

“If you can’t help them until they want help, what will get them to want help?”

When we ask this question, we change everything. We stop focusing on the problem, and start working on the solution. Love First intervention uses the power of love and concern in a specific and organized way to break through denial, so we can help our loved ones get the help they need.

Love First: a family’s guide to intervention, 3rd ed., by Jeff Jay and Debra Jay (Hazelden, 2021)

1. Why Intervention?

Is an intervention right for you? What are the alternatives? What are the next right steps? (1 min, 2 sec)

2. Consultation and Strategy

What’s the next right step? A 1-hour consult with a clinical interventionist will help you develop the right strategy. (54 sec)

3. A Love First Intervention

An overview of the Love First intervention process, and working with one of our clinical interventionists. (3 min, 19 sec)

4. My Passion for Intervention

Jeff Jay has been helping families and people suffering from addiction for more than 30 years. (1 min, 47 sec)

The Modular System

careful preparation | thorough planning

Module 1: Assessment & Training
This in-depth meeting brings your intervention team together and lays the foundation for a successful process. We begin with an overview of the Love First model and the larger picture of intervention, treatment, and long-term recovery.

Your clinical interventionist then gathers relevant history and perspective from each participant. This process helps everyone understand the real situation with your loved one, align as a team, and move forward with clarity and purpose.

We also provide step-by-step guidance on writing effective intervention letters using the Love First method, along with bottom-line letters if needed. We discuss the objections that may arise on intervention day and how to respond with calm confidence.

As part of this module, we review treatment recommendations, timing, admission options, and practical logistics. We also introduce recovery support after treatment, including our 12Care program.

Module 2: Preparation & Rehearsal
Planning and preparation are the cornerstones of a successful intervention. In this module, we conduct a full rehearsal of the intervention and carefully review every detail.

We read each intervention letter aloud, refining language and sequence so every message is clear, loving, and effective. We role-play responses to likely objections and review bottom-line letters, which are used only if resistance to treatment continues.

We finalize important logistics such as seating, timing, travel, transportation, and admission arrangements. We also plan for possible scenarios, including hesitation, refusal, or a walkout, so the team feels ready for whatever may arise.

Families often find this rehearsal deeply reassuring and empowering. Confidence grows, anxiety decreases, and the team becomes fully prepared for intervention day.

We also discuss ongoing support after treatment, including Structured Family Recovery and other resources to help your loved one maintain momentum upon returning home.

Between Modules 1 and 2, we’ll make treatment recommendations and assist you with pre-admission details at your chosen treatment provider. We’ll work with your core team members to explore support options during and after treatment, including Structured Family Recovery and 12Care, to help your loved one achieve their first full year of recovery.

We will also help with travel arrangements, as necessary. During Module 2 we’ll plan for various scenarios that could arise during the intervention, such as a refusal or a walkout. We’ll leave no stone unturned in our preparations. The rehearsal will be held the day before the intervention. Finally, we will plan for the first meeting of Structured Family Recovery, to begin after your loved one is admitted to treatment.

Module 3: Love First Intervention
On intervention day, your clinical interventionist guides the family through every step of the process. We begin with a pre-meeting to review final details, answer questions, and ensure everyone is grounded and ready.

We then proceed to the intervention itself, facilitating the reading of letters, responding to objections, managing emotions in the room, and helping your loved one move toward accepting treatment. Drawing on years of experience, the interventionist helps create a moment of clarity in which change becomes possible.

If treatment is accepted, we assist with the transition immediately and accompany your loved one to treatment that same day whenever possible. We continue to provide support through the admission and travel process, helping resolve any issues that arise.

The goal is not only entry into treatment, but the beginning of lasting recovery for the entire family.

Let’s talk

313-882-6921

“Jeff Jay led our family and team masterfully. He orchestrated and facilitated a successful intervention for our family with compassion, perceptiveness, and expertise. It was one of the most powerful experiences of our lives, both for our family and the close friends on the team.”

–Mother of an addicted son